"I do love knitting patterns."

Warning, this is a rant about an incident that happened today. So, no feelings will be spared.

As some of you are aware, my sister is pregnant. Relax, Donna Martins, she's 28 and married. So, it is hard for her to find maternity clothes. It's either kinda spendy, or just nothing interesting. However, top-wise, you can most likely wear loose tops, or long tops.

So her and I go into the Forever 21 in Portland. It's full of teeny-boppers, as my sister would say. Of course, she already knows the sex, and has only gained three pounds throughout the pregnancy. So, you can notice.

And she's getting funny looks, for it. For God's sake. These girls need a fucking clue.

Look at the clothes. Half of them are loose, bohemian-type clothes, perfect for hiding a belly.

I saw a guy randomly kicking a street sign (and I mean really kicking) and they think a pregnant 28-year-old (who could probably pass for 23) is funny?

So, I guess lack of common sense is a disease that's hitting outside of my town? Fuck.

All my bullying troubles started out in second grade, when I had to go to a new school. Granted, it was at the beginning of the school year, but that didn't make much of a difference. It didn't help at all that I acted a lot different than kids (read: Asperger's Syndrome, a form of autism), so I was most easily a target for kids.

I actually distinctly remember one instance in fifth grade, when we were at the local theater on a field trip, waiting for the show to start, and all the kids decided to play telephone. The game where one person thinks of a phrase to whisper in a person's ear, and they keep whispering the phrase to the next person to them, until everyone has gotten the message, and we see how it got distorted. Guess what everyone of those messages were? "Brittany (last name withheld) is a freak." "Brittany (last name withheld) is a loser." "I hate Brittany (last name withheld)."

At least I had a group of friends to fall back on.

Of course, it nonethless continued in middle school, where literally the whole class would tell me how much they hated me, how I was such a loser/freak/weirdo, save two people.

And even when I tried to apply the "social skills" I learned from a therapist to help me, it backfired. One time when I asked a girl about her "Countries" project where we had to study a country, trying to be nice, she looked at me and said "Yeah, I'm moving there just to get away from you." I tried smart ass remarks, and they would just twist my words around.

Oh, and did I mention that I had two classes with all of these people? Yeah, TWO HOURS of this. And one of the teachers did absolutely nothing about it.

Seventh grade was quite a nice bit of a break from it. Sure, I got a couple people who would give me a hard time, but I just told the school counsellor and things were fine.

Then we reached eigth grade. I literally had two friends turn on me, harass me online, do all in their power just to make me miserable. And they joined with many other girls specializing in giving me a hard time. Their bullying got so bad I had to switch to homeschool in the middle of the year.

Once I got to high school, it just kind of relaxed. Now these bullies avoid me, try their hardest not to talk to me.

But if there's one thing I could say, is that there are many, many people out there being bullied. You may feel like you're alone, but you are not.

I am just curious.

Why is the digital television switch so necessary?

I mean, why does it NEED to happen right this year?

Also, this is random, but a warning: I am under a huge amount of stress, because this time next week will be my last full day in town before leaving for New York. I still have to pack my carry-on, work hard on the song, and I don't know who I'm rooming with, if we'll be mixed or in sectionals, or what the director we're working with is like. And above all, I can't bring my bwankie. Oh, and it will be my first time traveling alone, and NYC will be the farthest I've travelled. So yeah, You can sense I'm stressed.

So Bree is concerned she's going to die.

I think it would be fitting if we gave her memorial LOLCats.

PLZ?

I had a dream a couple nights ago.

In it, I was talking with friends. Then a friend came up, with his girlfriend, Rihanna.

She said something mean about me. I said something mean back. She hit a low for me, I kicked her, she punched me. I punched her. She punched me on the side of the head. And then I lunged at her, and it went all terrible. It ended with her digging her stiletto heel into my leg.

Oh, did I mention someone taped this fight and put it on the web, and titled it "Rihanna and some girl fighting"

All thanks to MTV no longer playing music videos, I have decided to start a series of journals dedicated to music videos that were more than just dancing in front of a camera in a one-colored room. If you have any suggestions, message or leave me a note. However, emphasis on the word "suggestion". If I don't feature it, it's probably because I didn't like it. Plain and simple.

"Everytime" by Britney Spears*:

This music video is highly controversial because of blood, partial nudity and graphic scenes.

The video starts off with Britney and her boyfriend, played by Stephen Dorff, arriving in Las Vegas, as the papparzzi are waiting for her. One of them accidentally hits her in the back of the head, yet they keep on walking. The boyfriend is in the lobby, throwing magazines at the papparazzi, until her security escort them to their room, where the boyfriend throws a vase.
As he relaxes on the couch, she goes into the bathroom, and takes a bath. As she's relaxing, she notices blood on the back of her head, and falls into the tub and loses consciousness. Her boyfriend finds her in the bathtub unconscious, and calls for help. They escort her to the hospital, as we see shots of Britney running from a bright light, aka death. Towards the end, we see her running towards the light.
And then comes the dumbest ending in history. She rises back from the tub, smiles to herself, showing she imagined the whole scene. This scene was added to put light into the intensity of the video.

We of course see a shout-out from InTouch magazine.

Now, when you see red around her wrist, don't worry. This isn't blood on her wrist. It's just her red string bracelet frequently worn by Kabbalists. At the time, Britney was a Kabbalist after Britney was converted by Madonna. Many mistake it for blood, so don't feel stupid. Even I thought it was blood.

The only thing I can't stand about this video, is obviously the ending. I mean, seriously. She just pops up and it was all a dream. Just because some parents would be upset with a music video ending in death, doesn't mean you need to make it stupid.

When asked what the song is about, Britney told Diane Sawyer, "I'll let the song speak for itself," while many seem to believe it's about Justin Timberlake.

This video has even made it on MuchMusic's list of 50 Most Controversial Videos.

And that my friends, is a salute to the dying art of music videos.

Remember when Buzznet went into an uproar over Vanessa Hudgens calling her character "emo"? That was this movie. It was originally called Will (I hated this title, to be honest) and Rock On, by several magazines such as Tiger Beat, Bop, M, J-14 and Twist.

In the movie, Vanessa Hudgens' character plays a girl named Sa5m (the 5 is silent) who is brewing a romance with the main character, Will.

The film is produced by Walden Media (the company behind The Chronicles of Narnia) and Summit Entertainment (Many recognize them as the people behind Twilight.)

The thing I dislike about this movie so far is the stereotypes. The popular girl is blonde, and the outcast is a brunette. Come on!

Well, we'll have to see this movie for ourselves when it comes out. I think it looks like a more PG version of The Rocker.

Any thoughts on Bandslam?

It all started on the day of the Grammys. While people were going on about the Chris Brown/Rihanna drama, there were more drama than that going down.

Miley Cyrus and Kanye West both wanted to meet the band Radiohead. But when the two refused, the two got angry.
Of course, it's not shocking Kanye West would react to this. But Miley? A little different.

And who do you think started off this war of words? Miley, of course!
She went on the Johnjay and Rich show, and complained about the incident for six minutes. "I'm like, these are the people I really want to meet," she was quoted as saying. "I'd freak out. They're my rock gods. These are the only people that I would cry over…My manager asked and said, 'Miley's really obsessed. And they were like, 'We don't really do that.' "
Now, I would just like to say, Miley has said that the Bible is her "guide" to life. She is also quoted as saying that Radiohead are her "rock gods", and in the Ten Commandments, the very first one is "No other gods." (Exodus 20:3) Surely you know of the Ten Commandments?

Anyways, after she learned that Radiohead don't like her, she tells us that she "left 'cause I was so upset. I wasn't going to watch. Stinkin' Radiohead! I'm gonna ruin them, I'm going to tell everyone." Seriously. "Stinkin' Radiohead"? What are you, 12?
She's going to ruin them by telling everyone. Let me tell you something Miley. One time I got diarrhea from a resteraunt. I was so angry. Like, how could they do that? So I tried to ruin that resteraunt by telling everyone. Then my friend came up to me one day and said "STFU! Nobody cares!"

Radiohead responded with, "When Miley grows up, she'll learn not to have such a sense of entitlement." Wow. That's gotta hurt.

Kanye West complained that Radiohead singer Thom Yorke snubbed him as well. Kanye said on VH1's Storytellers, "When he performed at the Grammys, I sat the f--k down." Oh what a statement Kanye!

Well, the band concluded a blog post with this message: "Wish us all a safe journey if you still like us and you're not one of those people I have managed to offend by doing nothing."

So, what are your feelings on this? Share what you wise guys think!

Rolling Stone caught an interview with Taylor Swift for Issue #1073. And when the topic came to every teen star of this generation's favorite issue, abstinence, Taylor didn't say she was saving it for marriage. Wait, what? Someone involved with the new Disney generation, and the girl who hangs out with Miley Cyrus, Demi Lovato, and Selena Gomez, even dated a Jonas "We're purer than you!" Brother is not going on about chastity?

You read right folks. She tells Rolling Stone, "I feel like whatever you say about whether you do or don't, it makes people picture you naked. And as much as possible, I'm going to avoid that. It's self-preservation, really."

Well, it's damn obvious she didn't have sex with Joe Jonas.

Maybe she's saying nothing on the subject, because shes not actually signed with Disney. She is actually signed with indie country music label Big Machine Records. Her music just plays on Radio Disney, she makes an appearance in the 3D Jonas Brothers movie, will be making an appearance in the soon-to-be theatrical masterpiece, the Hannah Montana movie, credited as "Woman singing in the bar", and she hangs out with all their female stars.

To be honest, I have no problem with people personally saving it 'till marriage. I have a problem with people thinking it's such a big deal, that they're better than other people, that everyone else needs to do the same, etc. This is why I'm respecting Taylor Swift more. Because she is not letting the whole world know about her sex life, or lackthereof. Sorry, girls and JoBros, but when you keep bragging about how you're not  having sex, it's still talking about your sex life.

Oh boy, now I'm on a rant. My point is, Disney kids, I don't care whether or not you're having sex. But it gets a little annoying when you act like you're better than me because of it, or act like you're being rebellious. You're not.

A first edition Harry Potter book sold for about $19,000 at an auction house in Dallas. To be exact, $19,120.

While you can get a plain old Harry Potter book for under $20, but this one was autographed by J.K. Rowling herself! Apparently, this is a first edition, and only 200 were printed, and while a person claimed to have gotten a first edition for $22, an autograph from the author makes it special. $19,098 more special.

This may sound spendy, but that's not the most someone's spent on the wizard boy. Last year, a 800-word prequel to the series sold for $50,000 for a writer's group and dyslexia charity. The prequel was handwritten and signed by Rowling.

Tom Felton, the actor who plays Draco Malfoy in the Harry Potter series, is not only an actor, but a singer-songwriter. He writes songs, and plays them on his guitar, and posts them on his YouTube page, FeltBeats.

Tom Felton is quite internet savvy too, seing as he also has a Twitter.

And this morning, about five hours ago, Tom left a tweet, reading, "Would love to do a duet with Taylor swift,think she's really talented x"

I think this would be a great idea. It so needs to happen. I demand it.

And now, I leave you with the best mental imagery ever: Draco Mafloy, in the Slytherin common room, rocking out to T. Swift, while he moods over what he must do for Lord Voldemort.

Check it out, new Harry Potter news you guys!

Sorry, Disney Channel moment there.

First up, we have news of cast members. Actor Domhnall Gleeson, son of Brandon Gleeson, who played Mad-Eye Moody, will play the role of Bill Weasley. However, Clemence Poesy, who played Fleur Delacour in Goblet of Fire, has informed that her part is not written in Half-Blood Prince.
And the role of Mundungus "Dung" Fletcher will be played by Andy Linden.

Bill Weasley

And Dunghead.

It should prove interesting, seeing as Fleur and Bill get engaged in Half-Blood Prince, and Bill gets mauled by a werewolf, and afterwards, my favorite scene in the book pops up with Fleur, Bill, and Momma Molly. It should get "interesting" to see how it's done without Fleur Delacour.

In case you didn't know, March is Women's History Month. You didn't know? I'm not surprised.

So, I'm going to pimp out Women's History Month, just like TV Networks do with Black History Month and Hispanic Heritage Month.

So, you guys tell me your favorite woman in history. Guidelines?

• No actresses, except if they've actually broken a record or something. Such as Halle Barry, first African-American women to win the Oscar for Best Actress.
• I'm not sure if this rule is needed, but no female Hitlers or woman terrorists. Some might take offense to that.
• For the love of God, no Carrie Bradshaw. Seriously, why Glamour magazine considers a fictional woman a pivotal women's rights advocate is beyond me. She's a writer for Vogue, has an obsession for shoes, and above all, IS FICTIONAL!

Now, here is one of my favorites (yes, one)

Nellie Bly (1864-1922)

Nellie was actually born Elizabeth Jane Cochran, and was nicknamed "Pink" as a child because she would wear that color. Her father, a wealthy former associate judge, died when she was six, but her mother remarried three years later. When she was 14, her mother sued for divorce, and Nellie testified in court against her violent and drunken step-father. She changed her surname to "Cochrane" as a teenager to add sophistication.

In 1880, her and her family moved to Pittsburgh. This is where she got her start in journalism. After reading a sexist column in the Pittsburgh Dispatch, she wrote an angry rebuttal to the editor, who was impressed with her spirit and enthusiasm, and asked her to join the paper. Female news reporters usually used pseudonyms at the time, and the editor chose the name "Nellie Bly" after the song "Nelly Bly" by Stephen Foster.

Bly's early work was composed of investigative articles on female factory workers, but the editors pushed her to the fashion, society and gardening pages, which was a lot of women wrote during those times. Unsatisfied, she traveled to Mexico as a foreign correspondent. At only the age of 21, she protested the imprisonment of a local journalist for criticizing the Mexican government, which was at the time a reign or terror from Porfirio Diaz. When she returned home, she declared him a cruel czar who supressed the people of Mexico and controlled the press.

However, once again, she was stuck reporting theater and arts, so she left Pittsburgh for the Big Apple. After four months being penniless, she got into the offices of Joseph Pulitzer's New York World, and took an undercover assignment at the Women's Lunatic Asylum on Blackwell's Island, under reports of viciousness and neglect towards the patients.

After convincing people she was insane, she expierenced the abuse there firsthand. After ten days there, she was released by the New York World. She published her report, (which was later published into the book, Ten Days in a Mad-House) an investigation was launched on the conditions at the asylum.

In 1888, she suggested to her editor she embark on a journey across the world in 80 days. She left November 14th, 1889, and returned January 25th, 1890. Seventy two-days, six hours, eleven minutes, and fourteen seconds after her New York departure.

In 1894, she married millionaire manufacturer Robert Seaman, retired from journalism, and became the president of the Iron Clad Manufacturing Co., which made steel containers. For a while, she was one of the country's leading female industrialists, but she forced into bankruptcy by mismanagement. She was forced back into reporting, covering events such as the Woman's Suffrage convention of 1913 and stories on Europe's Eastern Fronts in World War I.

She died of pneumonia at St. Mark's Hospital in New York City in 1922 at age 57, and has a modest grave at Woodlawn Cemetary in Bronx, N.Y.

Who's your favorite female in history, and please explain why.

Cyndi Lauper was born and raised in Queens, New York. After her mother's second divorce, she began listening to Judy Garland, Billie Holliday, Ella Fitzgerald and the Beatles.

On October 14th, 1983, her most well-known album, She's So Unusual, was released. When recording it, she often altered songs to suit her, such as the hit song, "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun", which she felt the original lyrics given to her were a little misogynist, it being all about a woman pleasing a man.

Another hit song from the album, "Time After Time", was originally a chance for Lauper to prove herself to the label as a songwriter.

For being the age of 55, she still has a lot of energy and spunk in her. She released her ninth studio album in 2008, titled Bring Ya to the Brink. Also, in August 2008, she wrote an article for the Huffington Post entitled "Hope", encouraging Americans to vote for Barack Obama, and performed at the 2008 Democratic National Convention.

Essential Tracks:

"Girls Just Wanna Have Fun"
"True Colors"
"Time After Time"

From: Sean Penn, for Courage Campaign (info@couragecampaign.org)
Sent: Thu 3/05/09 3:08 PM
To: Brittany ****** (xbrittanyx_sxc@hotmail.com)

Dear Brittany,

Today is a turning point. And, as Harvey Milk used to say so often, we're "here to recruit you."

A few minutes ago, the California Supreme Court heard the final oral arguments in the case to overturn Proposition 8. Within 90 days, we will know whether the court will restore equal rights or uphold injustice.

There will be curse words, offensive statements, and pure rage involved. If you feel uncomfortable, then click "Back" and forget about it.

I am so fucking tired of people treating me like I'm stupid. Even people I DON'T FUCKING KNOW!

What the hell ever led people to believe that I am stupid? Is there some list of stupid people that I happen to be on?

Well I don't feel the need to list some credentials for anyone. I know I am smart.

If one more person treats me like an idiot one more time, I am going to go Christian Bale on that ass. Seriously. I will break Christian Bale's record for most "fuck" said in the span of three minutes.

Is this an issue of agism, sexism, or what?

But just a warning, I didn't change my display name to "It's Brittany Bitch" for nothing.

And for God's sake, if that buck-toothed idiot freshman plays that piano one more time, I am going to go ape shit.

Playing the latest pop song but not knowing how to play anything else does not make you a good piano player.

And you know what? You all are making me misogynist. Really. I think I'm beginning to hate women now. Or at least girls my own age.

Has this fucking class just become a pit of little girls bragging about the stupidest shit? Seriously.

You are in high school now you stupid freshman. Grow the fuck up.

God, this world is just making me want to isolate myself from the world. People are full of such fucking shit.

Yes, my friend, there are better search engines out there.

I introduce you to two:

GoodSearch.com

Good Search, powered by Yahoo, will donate 50% of it's advertising revenues to the charity of your choice!

When you go to the site goodsearch.com, type in the cause you want in the bar underneath. Say, "Domestic Violence" or "Cancer Research", or whatever. Then you will be given a drop-down list of centers you will be donating to. Click the one closest to you, or whatever. You click "Verify", and once your cause is confirmed, search away!

The downside? When you search for an image, it will pull a lot of results from Flickr. So if you're looking for a thumbnail for a Buzznet journal, you're out of luck.

Blackle.com

Did you know two Google searches use as much energy as boiling a cup of tea? Well, luckily, Google powers this site, Blackle. The backgrounds are black, not white, so your computer uses less energy.

Unfortunately, you can't really search for images.

Use these two search engines more often than Google, and you too can save the Earth. Without having to put on those tights.

Disney: The happiest place on Earth. Sort of.

You know, honestly, Disney can be dark. Moreso in the Disney Renaissance, though. Walt was mostly about the magic of childhood. However, the Disney Renaissance team were more into trying to entertain both children and adults. Because if the adults aren't entertained, it probably won't make that much money. Why else do you think Shrek is so huge?

Point is, my childhood had some pretty dark stuff. And so, let's look back at some dark stuff coming from the great mouse that didn't involve Tim Burton*.

10. The Adventures of Winnie the Pooh

I know the majority of the movie isn't that dark. It's all about Pooh, Christopher Robin and Co's adventures in the Hindred Acre Woods. So how the fuck could this movie be dark at all?

Well, first, Eeyore. The only guy more depressed than him is Charlie Brown. And that is saying something.

Second, the movie is broken up into different little stories. The last one, where Rabbit, annoyed by Tigger, concocts a plan with Pooh and Piglet to lead Tigger into some forest where he will get lost and never squash Rabbit's squashes again. That part of the story always creeped me out. Pooh, Piglet and Rabbit getting lost in a really dark forest with a bunch of fog and echoes. It's kinda scary.

And third, Pooh's "Heffalumps and Woozil's" dream always scared me. Those elephants and weasels looked evil! Take a look here.

9. Dumbo

I know what you're thinking. It's a film about a flying elephant, and it's just plain racist! (As seen above, and in the random song "Happy-Hearted Roustabouts" by some toiling black workers).

But it's higher than Pooh on the list for one reason. Four words: Pink Elephants on Parade. Fans of The Nostalgia Critic will know exactly what I'm talking about, but others may think I'm high. No. Walt Disney must've been when he made this scene.

It all starts off when Dumbo gets intoxicated, and has hallucinations of pink elephants creeping the fuck out of him. Check it out here.

8. Tarzan

Unlike most Disney films, where our hero loses one parent, Tarzan lost both of them. Meanwhile, Kala and her mate, Kerchak, have lost their little ape. Tarzan is shown not to be accepted by Kerchak, and that clearly makes him a little sad. And then, there's the scene where Tarzan reflects his decisions: To go to England with Jane, and leave his ape family behind, to stay with the apes, and lose Jane, as Kala tells him how she will always love him. My mom started crying, and yelling at me over this. "You said it was only sad in the beginning!" "Well I forgot this part! Sorry!"

Also, it does reflect a bit of old romantic literature. Our hero, Tarzan, is a bit of an outcast, seeing as leader Kerchak hates him, and everyone else gets mildly annoyed by his antics in the beginning, and even Terk tries to desert him. And there's a big appreciation of nature in the film. Maybe because it's set in the jungle.

7. Aladdin

First, our hero, Aladdin, isn't squeaky clean. He does steal, but only what he needs. Which makes you wonder: Is it ever okay to steal? And Aladdin is quite the little trickster, seeing as when he tricks the Genie out of a free wish. This trait also helps him later in the end, at the climax.
Also, how does Aladdin get to the princess? Unlike other Disney heroes, he doesn't randomly meet Jasmine during her chores and sing to her about how much all of the sudden loves her. Oh no. He meets her in the market place, then once he gets the Genie, he lies that he is a prince in order to marry Jasmine.

Jasmine also shows us that maybe being a princess isn't all that great. She's isolated, and forced to marry people she barely knows. Sounds dazzling, doesn't it?

The Genie is also not on the good end of the stick too. Forced for all eternity to grant the wishes of people, and live in a lamp. Sure, he gets "phenomenal, cosmic powers", but when you end up working Jafar, you begin to realize why the parrot is so moody.

And then, Jafar. His voice gives you goosebumps. He is so corrupt for power. No, not power to rule the world. But magical powers.

6. The Brave Little Toaster

The title is not doing this film any justice. I mean say that out loud: The Brave Little Toaster. Sounds like a pre-schooler TV show. So how does this film get dark?

The film is about five household appliances, a toaster, a lamp (named Lampy), an electric blanket (Blanky), a radio and a Kirby brand vacuum cleaner, on a quest to find their owner, Rob, who abandoned them.

I remember being younger, mocking the title of this film, then all of the sudden it would air on TV, and I'd be crying. Seriously, a film that makes you feel for a freaking toaster?

5. The Lion King

This movie goes into a cycle of happiness, then darkness, then happiness again, and we're back to the darkness. It's a teeter-totter.

The film starts off magnificent and happy. Simba and Nala are enjoying their childhood, and having fun as friends, and Simba dreams of his future as king. Then it gets dark. Scar sings about his plans, kills Mufasa, and convinces Simba to run away. And then..."Hakuna Matata", we're happy again! Then Naa comes back, and then they remain happy and fall in love! Then Nala reminds Simba of his duties as king, Simba goes emo, and it gets dark again. Then Rafiki helps Simba gain the confidence to fight for Pride Rock. And then our climax happens, with the battle between Scar and Simba, the hyenas and the lionesses. Then, Scar is defeated, and everything is happy again! It's the Circle of Life! Or, The Circle of Light and Dark.

If you need any doubt that the Lion King may have a glimmer of darkness, check out "Be Prepared" here. Then check out the German version. What does it remind you of?

4. The Fox and the Hound

This may be cheating a little, considering Tim Burton was an uncredited animator, but nonetheless, the film was dark. Or more sad.

As seen above, the beginning of the film is all sweet, charming. Then once Widow Tweed is forced to abandon Tod, it all goes sad from there. This was probably the first film I ever cried watching. I can't even remember the ending, probably because I was too busy crying. In fact, I'm starting to cry thinking of this film.

If you thought The Notebook was sad, this movie is even more sad. Freaking seriously.

3. Beauty and the Beast

Again, I can read your mind and know what you're thinking. How could a movie with talking candlesticks and teapotts be dark? Well, don't be so judgemental!

The film is so accidentally anti-early Disney. Our heroine is smart, selfless, loves her father through all his quirks, and falls in love with a beast. Our hero, doesn't even have a proper name**. He just goes by "The Beast" or simply "Beast" for short. He's also, to be honest, not that handsome throughout the movie, and is feared by the town. He also goes through a major personality change. Our villain, Gaston, is handsome, loved by the town, and constantly brags about how "manly" he is. He's who'd you think would be Prince Charming or Phillipe.

Now the plot. A young ten-year old prince is turned into a beast because he is selfish and spoiled. He must learn to love and be loved by 21st birthday. Also, all the workers in the castle are transformed into objects.
What part of that does not sound terrible? I mean, the kid will have to spend his teenage years as a monster. He has to be loved by his 21st birthday (I mean, who would tap that?) and innocent people working in the castle have to be part of this transformation too. I don't care how selfish this kid was. That enchantress is a bitch!

The atmosphere is just dark and brooding. There's barely any light coming in that castle at the beginning. And our hero, the Beast, is clearly in some form of a depression. Which is understandable. Who would want to tap that?

2. The Black Cauldron

Again, this maybe considered cheating, seeing as Tim Burton was the uncredited concept artist.

Where do I begin with this film?

First, let's explain what the Black Cauldron is. It's a cauldron, that when one owns it, they can command an army of dead warriors. The only way to stop it is for one to jump into the Cauldron. But they never come out.
So, who's the hero that jumps into the Cauldron? Gurgi, a lovable creature, who reasons that "nobody likes Gurgi."

The Horned King. Look at him! He has a skeleton face with horns popping out. Listen to him! He's got a more evil voice than Scar, Jafar, or any other Disney villain.

And the name. The Black Cauldron. It's clearly not a fake-out like The Brave Little Toaster.

So, if this doesn't make number one, what does?

1. The Hunchback of Notre Dame

If you didn't expect this, I'll hand you over to Christian Bale.

This film displays religious hypocrisy, racism (not Dumbo-like) and mob hysteria. London's The Daily Mail (before that whole Rihanna-anger-management scandal) stated that this is Disney's darkest picture.

Quasimodo is born with physical deformities, believed to be a demon by Judge Claude Frollo, is locked up in a bell tower, and hated by town. He not only struggles with Claude Frollo about Esmeralda and other evil things Frollo does, but he struggles so much inside. He struggles with what he's been taught by Frollo, he struggles with his love for Esmeralda, and he struggles with being, well, physically deformed.

Frollo commits terrible acts, but claims he is a good Catholic. For even more, go here.

There is a lot of Catholic overtures and concepts of Christianity, It is the first Disney animated film to use the word "damnation". Frollo sings a song about his lust for Esmeralda, and how he fears it may send him to Hell. Our villain tries to wipe out all the gypsies (read: genocide)

The only cheeriness in the film comes from the comic relief gargoyles, and the leader of the Gypsies, Clopin. But even those end up taking part in the dark and depression. Clopin takes part in being creepy during the song "Court of Miracles" when he nearly hangs Quasi and Phoebus. Then, after the gargoyles convince Quasi that there's no way Esmeralda wouldn't want to date him (through song), we then see Esmeralda making out with Phoebus, thus, Esmeralda loves Phoebus.

How this film got a G rating is beyond me.

Thank you all for reading this! Hope you liked it!

Honourable Mention

Bambi Sure, Bambi may have that terrible death scene, where Bambi's mother gets shot, but then afterwards, there are birds and people singing "La la la la". I'm not even joking. Death is not dealt with by denial and singing "Lala." At least, not in darkness.

WARNING: I do not pretend to be a Disney, or dark film expert. I am merely a fifteen-year old girl with opinions. If you disagree with this list, you may calmly state why. But when you reach to rude levels, I reach to rude levels. Just a warning.

* If The Fox and the Hound and The Black Cauldron are considered cheating, consider this a Top 8 list and remove those two.
** This just in: The Beast's name is Adam. Goodnight everybody!

All of the favorite cartoon stars of the late 80s/early 90s join together!
And why is it they joined together? To fight off corruption from some bad guy? To stop some form of a Y2K bug? No. To convince one kid to quit doing drugs.

The whole thing is like a half-hour star-studded PSA about how marijuana is bad.
During the 90s, the message that "drugs are bad" was just about everywhere. Hell, I remember on the back of a garbage can was "Just say no!"
But of course, frying eggs and kids singing songs wasn't enough. Oh no. They had to bring in our cartoons.

Also, they only had one Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle: Michaelangelo. And he sounds like Sean Penn in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

The fact that Pooh, Tigger, Huey, Dewey, Louie, and Kermit the Frog are preaching to me about marijuana is just weird to me. Seriously, I would Pooh and Tigger preach about sharing, Kermit preach about going green, and the duck triplets just not preach and go on fantastic adventures with Uncle Scrooge.

I mean, I get the message they were trying to send out, but really, come on!

If you need anymore proof, here you go: