"I do love knitting patterns."

If all works out, I will be going to New York City next year to perform at Carnegie Hall with a mass choir.
We will be there for five days, rehearse and perform with a professional orchestra at Carnegie Hall, stay at four or five star hotel (maybe the Hilton), go on a dinner and dance cruise in New York Harbor, a tour of the Empire State Building, and hopefully see a show at either the Met, or Broadway (give my regards to BROOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAADWAY) and hang around Times Square (hopefully Becks will be on TRL that day ;) (Just putting it ou there!) oo...)

The only problem is the trip is a bust if less than 20 people sign up, and it costs 2 grand.
But I plan on raising the money myself.
By making jewelery, cleaning my mom's work AND hopefully I can fill out the forms necessary to get a job somewhere.

But hope and pray for me that everything works out.
So I can go to New York City!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For the Buzznet Underworld group, I decided I would create some fun links for you all.

---

Quizzes:

What Type of Vampire are you? (with anime pictures)

Are you a Vampire...or Werewolf?

What Vampire Are You (With Cool Pics)?

Are You A Vampire or Werewolf? (Twilight Version)

What Kind of Vampire Are You? (by the way, the quiz is annoying, but the results are worth it.)

---

To Find a Name:

For Victorian Vamps

Craving the dark vampiric name?

Actual names of vampires.

For the list of gothic names, nearly endless.

The gothiest names to exist.

For royal vampire boys.
And girls.

Heroes.
And heroines.

And if you want to go medieval...

---

Hunting Info:

Watch your back.

Highgate Hunt.

A guide to hunting.

---

And just cause...

Vampire Lingo and Phrases.

---

Thank you all for reading this.

And remember:
There's a whole in the world that's a great black
And it's filled with people who are filled with shit
And the vermin of the world who inhabit it!

Shalom.

I have yet to listen to Mariah Carey's album, but here's what I think it sounds like:

1. "Migrate" "From the bar to the V.I.P./ We migrate" You mean into your limo? Why write/sing a song about that? *headdesk* Just what the world needs-- another possible song for Ice Age 3.
2. "Touch My Body" You know what, I kinda like this... Oh WILLIAM!
3. "Last Kiss" OH SO CLICHE! Another "We Belong Together"? Mariah, sequels tend to be WORSE than the original.
4. "Lovin' You Long Time" Sounds like a Fergie lyric.
5. "Thanx For Nothin" Wow, taking song titles from Fall Out Boy. How original.
6. "That Chick" What chick?
7. "Cruise Control" With guest appearances from Tom Cruise. Rapping. And jumping. On couches. FAIL.
8. "Side Effects" I'm guessing this is an Emancipation reject, written about, well, the side effects of that whole "Glitter" thing.
9. "Love Story" This was written in partnership with Kay Jewlery.
10. "OOC" Stands for "Out of Control" I think better suited for Lindsay Lohan.
11. "Bye Bye" A song about death. Now she's pretending to be My Chemical Romance.
12. "I Wish You Well" So that's exactly why you made this album?

And the cover:

Nothing spectacular.
Snooze.

DISCLAIMER: Before you post any negative comments, I would like to tell you that this journal was not made for serious purposes, and made to entertain Buzznet users. So take a deep breath and relax. Thank you and shalom.

My middle school did teach Sex Ed, but it wasn't a good Sex Ed program.
It was basically:
"This is how it works" and "Here's what happens if you don't be safe."
They never taught us how to BE safe.
I never once heard "condoms" or "birth control" mentioned.
And the other middle schools were bribed with "ATM" (Abstinence 'Til Marriage) cards that offered discounts and freebies at businesses if you promised to be abstinent. (Trust me, my ex-boyfriend, you know, this one, got one of those cards.)
It was like they were TRYING to keep parents happy by not mentioning anything considered "controversial".

And my high school has absolutely no Sex Ed program at ALL.
None.

I get my sex education from two factors:
Reading
and my mother.
I am fortunate to have a very close, loving relationship with my mother.
We've already discussed that if I decide to become sexually active, I am only using condoms, and if those backfire and I get pregnant, I will give it to my sister, who desperately wants a child, and I think her and her husband would make excellent parents.

But not all children are as fortunate as me to have a close relationship with their parents so they can talk about these things.
I see girls with babies and toddlers who are only sixteen.
And hear girls always in the bathrooms "So I had sex with so and so this weekend"
They're not getting the information they NEED!

The best sex education our school gets?
Two kids handing out condoms.
And the crazed Mr. Waggle.

I think schools should teach Sex Ed (though the best teachers in that subject are parents (after all, there is you, right? (unless they're Shakers.)))
And more than just abstinence.
About condoms.
Myths and facts.
Birth control.
The whole enchilada.

And that, my people, is what grinds my gears.

Shalom.
Brittany

P.S. I hope they do serve enchiladas in class, too.

I dedicate this to William Beckett, Michael Guy Chislett, Patrick Stump, Josh Farro, Jason Siska and Jamie Campbell Bower.

This is a song about sex, straight-up sexual reproducing.
Enjoy it.

---

I'm feeling Yummy head to toe (you see me)
Ain't got no patience so let's go (you see me)
Look, I'm diet drama
Wanna spend the night? Don't bring pajamas
Man there's so much heat beneath
these clothes (you see me)

Walk in, the place
They know, my face
Encore, sophomore
Only one solo, I swore
Big mouth, applause
Oh please, one more
Wanna hear it before I say naw
Let me check my itinerary
Ummm, alright
Presto, skintight
Escaped & I risked my life
For what? So I can watch them bite
Only one Gwen you can find like
this, I mean blow your mind
like this
Your key won't shine like this,
if it's yours then you know it
won't wind like this
(Wind it up)

[ CHORUS ]
I'm feeling Yummy head to toe (you see me)
Ain't got no patience so let's go (you see me)
Look, I'm diet drama
Wanna spend the night? Don't bring pajamas
Man there's so much heat beneath
these clothes (you see me)
I know you've been waiting but
I've been off making babies
& like a chef making donuts & pastries
It's time to make you sweat
Sex & sugar is the flavour
Ovens & beaters & graters
Beats made of bongos & shakers
It's time to make you sweat

[ Pharrell ]
Walk in, the place
They know, my face
Billion-aire boys, ice cream
dripping 'cross the floor
Big house, garage, bentleys, ferrar
Wanna go before I say naw
[ Lyrics found at www.mp3lyrics.org/ePN ]
Let me check my itinerary
Ummm, alright
G4, G flight, bed in the back so I have a G night
Good night, hood right?
Ain't no n--- you can find like
this, I mean blow your mind like
this
N---'s watch don't shine like
this, if it's ticking then it
don't tell time like this

[ CHORUS ]
I'm feeling Yummy head to toe (you see me)
Ain't got no patience so let's go (you see me)
Look, I'm diet drama
Wanna spend the night? Don't bring pajamas
Man there's so much heat beneath
these clothes (you see me)
I know you've been waiting but
I've been off making babies
& like a chef making donuts & pastries
It's time to make you sweat
Sex & sugar is the flavour
Ovens & beaters & graters
Beats made of bongos & shakers
It's time to make you sweat

Now sweat, baby
Get stupid, jump up go crazy
L.A.M.B, in 3D
Worldwide across your TV
P you crazy, how'd you get this?
This sounds like disco tetris
Do I have time to connect this?
Let me check my itinerary, Ummm

I came back for my spotlight (for her spotlight)
I disappeared like Houdini (where Houdini?)
If yours didn't come out right (if it's not right)
Go to Kinkos & xerox me

[ CHORUS ]
I'm feeling Yummy head to toe (you see me)
Ain't got no patience so let's go (you see me)
Look, I'm diet drama
Wanna spend the night? Don't bring pajamas
Man there's so much heat beneath
these clothes (you see me)
I'm feeling Yummy head to toe (you see me)
Ain't got no patience so let's go (you see me)
Look, I'm diet drama
Wanna spend the night? Don't bring pajamas
Man there's so much heat beneath
these clothes (you see me)
I know you've been waiting but
I've been off making babies
& like a chef making donuts & pastries
It's time to make you sweat
Sex & sugar is the flavour
Ovens & beaters & graters
Beats made of bongos & shakers
It's time to make you sweat

---

Listen to it here.

---

Thank you all for reading this.
I hope you all enjoyed it.

Shalom.
Brittany

This is a short, amateur poem I wrote for the "Effortless" task for Word Play.

Please let me know whether or not it's any good.

---

Every move he makes
Every breath he takes in
Everything he does
Effortless

Effortless is his smile
Effortless is his charm
Effortless is my admiration for him

He can smile
He can charm
He can talk his way to my heart
But somehow, I fear
We shall never meet
Again

Krystyn (ikkyg) or anyone with photoshop, make ads of all the deserving Buzzmakers parodying the ads of Audrey/Hanna Beth/Jeffree Star/etc.
The list would be:
Wendy (johnnynotisd)
Ashly (newageamazon)
John (ounceofwentz)
Shiona (unsceneunheard)
Kassady (kassady)
Sarah (hyperballad13)
Brittany (stewieismyhomeboy)
miseryxchord.
Who agrees with me?

(I think I may be forgetting someone though... if so, tell me and I'll put them on there!*)

*Audrey Kitching and other scene queens do NOT count.

The Challenge: List 12 songs that cheer you up.

The Rules:Tag 8 people , then they have to tag 8 aswell.

My songs (not in any particular order):

"LDN" by Lily Allen

"Neighbors" by The Academy Is...

"The World Has Its Shine (But I Would Drop It On A Dime)" by Cobra Starship

"Vienna" by Billy Joel

"Dejalo" by Rilo Kiley

"Burning Down The House" by Rilo Kiley

"White Houses" by Vanessa Carlton

"Bang The Doldrums" by Fall Out Boy

"Breakin' Up" by Rilo Kiley

"The Worst Pies In London" from Sweeney Todd

"Part Of Your World" from The Little Mermaid

"Yummy" by Gwen Stefani

I tag:

hidedontseek, mcrafipatd, tryingtofindthewords, mykindanormal, jenrrray, breesays, gemmaxloves, hyperballad13

As reccomended by Angie, I am posting another journal. ACtually, embarking on a journal project.

Yes, I will dedicate songs to people as Madison and Sue did, but I promise to make it as original as I can.

---

I would like to dedicate this song to Buzznet as a whole.
"No Place Like London" from Sweeney Todd.
At times, Buzznet can be more beautiful as the dardinels, or the mountains of Peru.
With it's excellent community feeling.
The feeling you get when you talk to wonderous people such as John, Wendy and Krystyn, Sara, Sarah and Angie, Gemma, Seb and Ashly. Savannah, Shiona and Bree, Mark, Kerri and Kassady.

But then, here comes the negativity.
The e-drama.
The scene queens who start it.
The ignorant fans who support it with their life.

Indeed, there's no place like Buzznet.

---

Antony

I have sailed the world
beheld its wonders
from the dardinells,
to the mountains of Peru,
But there's no place like London!
I feel home again...
I could hear the city bells ring...
Whatever would I do?
No there's...

Sweeney Todd

No place like London...

Antony (spoken)

Mr. Todd, sir

Sweeney Todd

You are young...
Life has been kind to you...
You will learn.
(Spoken) 'Tis here we go our seperate ways.
Farewell Antony.
I will not soon forget the good ship bountiful, nor the young man who saved my life.

Antony

(Spoken) There's no cause to thank me for that, sir.
It would have been a poor Christian indeed who would have spotted you
pinching and tossing on that raft and not given the alarm.

Sweeney Todd

(Spoken)
There's many a Christian would've done just that and not lost a winks sleep over it either.

Beggar Woman

(Sung) Alms, alms for a miserable woman, on a miserable chilly mornin'!
Thank ya, sir, thank ya...
How would ya like a little muff,
dear a little jig-jig,
a little bounce around the bush!
Wouldn't ya like to push me parsley?
It looks to me, dear, that you've got plenty there to push!
Alms, alms for a pitiful woman...
what's got wandering wits?
Hey! DOn't I know you, mister?

Sweeney Todd

Must you glare at me, woman?
Off with you!
Off I say!

Beggar Woman

Then how would ya like to split me muff?
Mister, we'll go jig-jig!
A little...

Sweeney Todd

Off I said!
To the devil with you!

Beggar Woman

Alms, alms for a pitiful woman!

Antony (Spoken)

Pardon me, sir, but there's no need to fear the likes of her,
she's only a half-crazed beggar woman...
London's full of them.

Sweeney Todd (spoken)

I beg your indulgance, boy, my mind is far from easy.
For in the once familiar streets I feel a chill of ghostly shadows everywhere.
Forgive me.

Antony (spoken)

There is nothing to forgive.

Sweeney Todd (spoken)

Farewell, Antony.

Antony (spoken)

Mr. Todd, before we part...

Sweeney Todd (spoken)

What is it?

Antony (spoken)

I have honored my promise never to question you.
Whatever brought you to that sorry shipwreck is your affair and yet, over
many weeks of our voyage home,
I've come to think of you as a friend,
and if trouble lies ahead for you in London, if you
need any help...or money.

Sweeney Todd (spoken)

No!
(sung)
There's a whole in the world like a great black pit
and the vermin of the world inhabit it
and its morals aren't worth what a pin can spit
and it goes by the name of London.
At the top of the hole sit the previlaged few
Making mock of the vermin in the lonely zoo
turning beauty to filth and greed...
I too have sailed the world and seen its wonders,
for the cruelty of men is as wonderous as Peru
but there's no place like London!
--
There was a barber and his wife
and she was beautiful...
a foolish barber and his wife.
She was his reason for his life...
and she was beautiful, and she was virtuous.
And he was nieve.
There was another man who saw
that she was beautiful...
A biased vulture of the law
who, with a gesture of his claw
removed the barber from his plate!
And there was nothing but to wait!
And she would fall!
So soft!
So young!
So lost and oh so beautiful!

Antony (spoken)

The lady, sir, did she, sir, come?

Sweeney Todd (sung)

Ah, that was many years ago...
I doubt if anyone would know.
(spoken)
Now leave me, Antony.
There is somewhere I must go,
something i must find out.
Now, and alone.

Antony (spoken)

But surely we will meet again before I am off to Plymouth?

Sweeney Todd (spoken)

If you want you may well find me around Fleet Street. I wouldn't wander.
(sung)
There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
and it's filled with people who are filled with shit!
And the vermin of the world inhabit it!

---

Listen to it here.

---

Thank you for reading this!
And remember:
There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
And it's filled with people who are filled with shit!
And the vermin of the world inhabit it!

Shalom,
Brittany
stewieismyhomeboy

I have been searching for a new profile look.

So, I might be changing my profile on a daily basis.

Your comments are appreciated!

And I have made some banners:

So take a pick of your favorite.

Just been expirementing WAY too much!

So, I know my new profile resembles a lot of resemblance to Wendy's (johnnynotsid) and Wendy, if you have this problem, let me know. Kay?

You go to the movies.
You're excited to see this movie you've been waiting a while to see.
Whether it be or a comedy, such as Juno, or a horror musical such as Sweeney Todd, whatever it is, you can't wait until the opening credits roll up so you can see what you hope is a beautiful masterpiece of cinema.
What you don't want to hear?
The annoying fellow movie-goers you're forced to share a theater with.

Here is your guide to understanding this cinematical pain-in-the-asses.

---

The "Here it comes!" Kid

His/her offense: You're trying to watch a suspenseful scene in the film, when, behind you, hear "Here it comes! Watch it comes!".
Not only is he trying to be a smart-ass, he's talking while you're trying to enjoy the movie!
My expierence with him/her: When I went to see Juno, the kid behind me kept saying "He's gonna hit him in the nuts!" when Beeker went to the hospital to see Juno. Not only was it completely improper to say this during an emotional scene, it didn't happen. I wanted to turn around and say "I'm gonna throw my popcorn at you! Here it comes!" and throw it at him and say, "And THAT actually happened!" but alas, I am too nice of a person to do that.
Where they can be found: Usually in a horror movie, but there are exceptions (such as, well, Juno.)

---

The "Haha! He/She Said..." Kid

His/her offense: Though he is young, he is the annoying little brat that repeats every "funny" line said in the movie.
Obviously, if it was funny, it doesn't need to be repeated.
My Expierence with him/her: When I saw The Incredibles (yes, a while back, I know) there was a kid behind my mom and I who repeated EVERY line the characters said. It was like he was reading the script himself!
Where they can be found: In any kids movie.

---

The Obsessive Phone Freak

His/her offense: Usually a business man talking on the phone in the middle of the movie.
If it's so important, take it outside!
My expierence with him/her: Thankfully, none yet.
Where they can be found: Any movie, frankly.

---

The PDA Couple

His/her offense: I do not believe it is proper to make out in public, including the movie theater.
GET A ROOM!
My expierence with them: I admit to being this type of movie-goer, but I do not encourage for the sake of fellow movie-goer's appetite.
Where they can be found: Their natural habitat is a romance movie.

---

I hope you enjoyed this.
And remember to not throw your good food at these annoying movie-goers. It does not help the situation at all, unfortunately.

In one of the books I checked out from the school library entitled "Coping with...Date Rape and Acquaintance Rape" (I checked it out for research for my story, by the way. Don't worry!) there are some fictional stories, but are based on true stories of victims.

There is one where a young woman, "Kim", who was had dated her boyfriend, "Scott", for three years, and both were quite religious and opted to practice abstinence. She had to do a project with a man in her sociology class, "John", and they went into her dorm to work on it. Her roommate couldn't concentrate, so she left to study in the library. "John" then raped her. "Kim" called "Scott" tearfully and told him about what had happened, hoping he would be there for loving support. He was not. He said he could "only marry a virgin" and thought it was HER fault and broke up with her.

First off, the rape victim is not at fault. The rapist is at fault. And emotionally, "Kim" is still a virgin. She didn't give herself to "John", he took her. I want to punch "Scott" in the face.
A good boyfriend should put his selfish needs aside when his girlfriend raped, and focus on her troubles. Same goes if the boyfriend was raped. Breaking up with her for being raped is fucking ridiculous.

Now onto the next story that got me even more pissed.

"Annette" rode home she had met through a mutual friend. He told her he would take the "scenic route" to her house. Miles from the destination, he pulled over and forced her to have sex. Then he drover her home.
When "Annette" got home, her mother yelled at her for being home late. Annette explained what happened, including the rape.
Her mother's reply?
That she was a "sinner" and "needed to be saved", and "deserved what she got" for accepting a ride with a man she hardly knew, and "should be ashamed for disgracing the family".

I don't know about you, but this woman should not have kids.
A good mother does NOT say this to their child to has been raped.
A good mother should offer support and reassure their child is still a good person and is not at fault.
Not fucking yell at them and calling them a sinner.
And I've read the bible, and nowhere does it say "It is a sin to be raped." It says it's a sin TO rape, but that God will help a person who has BEEN raped.
I want to beat this shit out of this so-called mother.
And offer "Annette" a place to stay at my place with my mother who is a good mother and offer the support and love Annette so desperately needs.

Excuse my language.

Thank God these stories are only fictional.

When I find out where the auditions are, I will be auditioning as an extra for the Twilight movie.
I do know that they are filming at either R.A. Long high school (damn lumberjacks) or Kalama High School, and they just want kids who look like normal high school kids. And I am one!
Also, many of my friends and I are going to audition also.
So, if I get it, be sure to see if you can spot me!
I will let you know if I get it.
So, wish me luck!

BREAKING NEWS: Writer's Strike is OVER! (JustJared)

Eva goes house-hunting. (INO)

Selling the Lipstick Jungle? (ASL)

Penelope Cruz and Scarlett Johansson to...make...love... (CelebSlam)

To good to be true. (AgentBedHead)

IBBB reviews Heidi Montag's music video.

What is up with that Kim Kardashian lawsuit anyway? (Cele|bitchy)

Amy won't attend Grammys, and I win $20. (ASL)
The Osbourne house gets EVEN crazier! (Allieiswired)

Posh Spice: singer, wife, mother, fashion designer? (JustJared)

So you DON'T have to go to rehab? (Allieiswired)

Argyle is fashionable! (Galadarling)

New trend: Capes? (INO)

 

Here is installment #2 in my series about finding your confidence. Enjoy my lovies!

***
I Love You...

So...you may find this chapter cheesy, but I do not.
How would you feel if your celebrity crush found you beautiful?
Well then, have I got a challenge for you.

First, think of your number one celebrity crush/love.
Think of his face.
Think of his voice.

Now I want you to imagine him telling you that you are the beautiful person you are.
Example:
Amy Winehouse: "John, you are the most beautiful, happy, hottest man I have ever seen. I love you Johnny!"
Think of it over and over again.
Getting used to someone TELLING you that you're beautiful (even though you're IMAGINING it), helps you get used to KNOWING you are beautiful.

Next, try writing love notes as your celebrity crush/love, and post them on your page.
Like these:

Make Love Letters at MySpacePimper.com

Send a Dozen Roses at MySpacePimper.com
Make Love Letters at MySpacePimper.com
Make Love Letters at MySpacePimper.com  

Completely ridiculous.

Dear Ms. or Mr. (whatever the hell you go by) Star

Do you know EXACTLY what a child who's mother did drugs or drank alcohol when they were in the womb looks like?
Do you know what a whore is?
Hell, do you even know how to spell "Internet" or "like"?

What you said is completely out of line.

You cannot call someone ugly, especially if you don't know what they look like! You do know ugly means "unattractive", right?
Cause I consider YOU ugly, but that's beside the point.

You do know that a child whose mother smoked crack cocaine (surprised you knew what it was called) when they were in the womb does not look ugly, but DEFORMED. Huge difference. And for you to use that as insult, whether it is true or not, is absolutely ridiculous.

And children whose mother did drugs while they were in the womb do not lead a "pathetic life", but a miserable life.
Using a disease to insult someone out of YOUR insecurity and making fame and money out of it? THAT is a pathetic life!

If I had it my way, Mark would take away your account for saying such things like these.

You are how old?
Like, 30?
How could you be as immature and uneducated to actually use these as insults?

And for those of you who defend him for saying these:

You are just as low as him.
How on Earth could you have a heart for agreeing with him whilst he says these awful things to someone he doesn't even know!
I do not want to hear from you people ever again, until you have educated yourself on why nobody deserves to be called this.

And don't even THINK about adding me, cause I will deny faster than you could say "Betch."

Word: Louche
Say it: LOOSH
SO what does is mean? Of questionable taste or morality; disreputable or indecent; dubious; shady.

Example: As with the case of Vanessa Hudgens, Ashley Tisdale, and now apparently Miley Cyrus, many question is Disney is becoming quite the louche company.

Now YOU try it!

Cheesy title, innit it?

Anyways, I have come up with the idea to help my fellow Buzznet members gain confidence as part of hyperballad13 and mrsstumph's Real People Campaign.

So, as me venturing into a career as a life coach, listen to my weekly advice to gain confidence, look at yourself as the beautiful person.

***
Step 1: Look at You, Not Someone Else

I bet you five bucks you have at least one favorite body part. I bet you 20 more that you look good in a swimsuit. Not gonna go with the bet? Smart idea.
Now let's focus away from gambling and to someone important-YOU.

First thing, look in the mirror.
Better yet, put on a bikini and look in the mirror.
Don't even cheat with a one-suit.
BIKINI!
If you're a guy, strip down to your trunks.
Take off that shirt.

Now, go get yourself some mayonnaise and a spoon.

Now, look at yourself in the mirror.
Open your mouth and tell yourself some nice outer appearance traits you have.
Example:
"I have great legs. They're a mile-high."
"I have one nice ass."
"I have excellent abs."

But what if a bad thought crosses into your brain?

Take a spoonful of mayonnaise.
Eat it.
Just the mayonnaise.
Oh, you say you like mayonnaise?
Okay, rebel.
Get a spoonful cinnamon, Cool Whip, anything that you think tastes disgusting.
This should show how bad things are coming in.
Keep the bad vibes away.

Can't think of anything you like about yourself?
Here is some examples of what some members of the campaign said about their bodies:
heartbroken4stumph: My hair. It's thick and in the summer (if I don't dye it) it gets lighter and shimmers in the sunlight.
hidedontseek: I love my smile, eyes (especially when I'm wearing eyeliner), hair (when it has been cut), and sometimes my creativity.
xxsupersophiexx: My eye area in general. I always get complimented on the colour and my eyelashes and my eyebrows. Ooh, and I like my freckles, and I also get told how silky my hair is, even though I've dyed it a couple of times.

***

Now I end with two suggestions:
*Keep reading these, so you can gain confidence in that you are you!
*Join the Buzznet's Real People Campaign. Filled with thought-provoking journals, supportive members and fun forum topics.

Now go wear bikinis and avoid the mayo.
Shalom.
Brittany.

Usually every scene queen claims to be a model.
I haven't seen them in Victoria's Secret catalouges (and my brother collects, so I could easily access them.)
I 've only seen them in Skeleanimals ads in Alternative Press (and they're disgracing my dear Marcy the Monkey and Kit Cat!)
I haven't seen them modeling for Teen Vogue or Allure or any fashion magazine.
So are they even technically models?

This post by the lovely, intelligent Kristyn (did I spell that right?) got me thinking.

Although I hate Gisele, I can say she is a model.
She sells those bras she wears in Victoria's Secret catalouges.
She sold that belt by Dolce & Gabana that shrinks your waist to the size of a soccer ball.
Her editorials are true pictures of art.

If you've ever seen America's Next Top Model, you'd know a true model has to own the picture.

Though you see a burning car around her, I can't help but stare at Chantal (???) and her dress.

Saleisha sells those tulips.

You can barely see her, but you are focused on her.

A perfect gladiator.

She looks great with those weird-ass things surrounded by her.

Now, here is some pictures of Audrey's (if you can hold them down.)

WHO wears tutus and heels to the beach?
And she looks positively bored here.

This is the worst way to offend the Asian continent.

Her expression looks as nasty as those burgers.
So much for vegetarianism.

She also looks bored here?
And is this really for Heatherette?
If so, I have lost respect for them.

She has the worst expression here.
Ariel would be ashamed.

Are those crabs on her?
In purple water?
What the?

So what exactly makes people think Audrey is a model?
Or any scene queen for that matter?
A true model is versatile, can sell their product, their background, whatever.
Audrey is only selling herself.
Trying to make herself look good.

Don't have a date for Valentine's Day? Fret not. You can go out with your gal-pals and celebrate the single life! Here are some good songs to put on the soundtrack for the night.

By the way, Miley Cyrus' "GNO", not included. And I did have to put in the cheese factor somewhere.

10. "Since U Been Gone" by Kelly Clarkson

Of course, I had to put on the cheese with this one.
Remember when everyone was obsessed with this song? It was the "Umbrella" from a few years ago. But this one had the message "Screw guys.", which is why this pick had to be on here.
9. "Single" by Natasha Bedingfield

As Natasha says in this song, "Don't need to be on somebody's arm to look good.", which is SO true for any female. (Perhaps some males, but they are not the focus here.)
8. "You'll Only Make It Worse" by New Years Day

"If the world froze over and everybody died, and you and I were the only ones alive. I'd say I'm sorry you made it, it's more than you deserve." Not exactly the sweetest sentiment to a guy, is it?
7. "Knock 'Em Out" by Lily Allen

Here is a song about Lily's not-so-sweet message to the drunk guys at bars who always hit on girls. Ah...
6. "A Dark Congregation" by The Hush Sound

Okay, so maybe it's not TECHNICALLY a girl-power song, but it's fun, Greta has a nice voice, and I CAN'T WAIT for the new album. Sorry.
5. "Just A Girl" by No Doubt

Admit it, you miss No Doubt. Gwen fills a good void, but you miss the other four. "Oh I'm just a girl livin' in captivity."
4. "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls

When you think "Girl-Power", you think the Spice Girls. They are the epitome of girl-power. Forget the past.
3. "Ladies' Night" by Kool & the Gang

Okay, so maybe they ARE guys, but the title explains the song WELL.
2. "Breakin' Up" by Rilo Kiley

Jenny Lewis sings about breaking up quite well. And the beat is so awesome. And they have a gospel choir? How can you beat that?
Well, one did...
And it is...
1. "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" by Cyndi Lauper

This is the BEST girl-power song EVER! Nothing can beat it! (Sorry Jenny Lewis) The lyrics, the beat, the rythym, the...EVERYTHING!

Thanks for reading this list. If you disagree, well, make your own list!
Shalom.
stewieismyhomeboy